My Primary School Best Friend

One of my fondest memories is from primary school, as some of us know it, and elementary school for others. I had just switched to my family's school(no! my family does not own the school, but all my siblings, including my brother who is now close to 40, went to that school) in primary two when i met the girl that became my best friend. Co-incidentally, both our immediate older brothers had been best friends as well.

We split ways at the end of primary school as she went on to a private school and i was shipped far away to one of those federal girls school in a town i had never heard before that time. Of-course we made new sets of friends, but everytime i came back home we got in touch but i guess that relationship never went back to the way we had it.

I actually attribute a part of whom i am today to my primary school best friend for some reason. I believe the year was 1995. My friend invited me to a christian camp that she attended the previous year, and since i was still trying to get that old relationship we had, i was willing to go to another town and spend a week out of my dear vacation at another boarding school, which by the way was not as bad as my school, maybe because it was also a private school. Anyway, a group of young people together, no parents, different platoons, and of-course for we girls we had "boys" and for the boys, they had "girls." We had major fun and learned that being young and a christian was a plus and was cool too; this allowed me to freely love the Lord till this day.

Anyway, that was just side story abi na reminiecing, my friend and i never really reestablished that primary school love, but regardless we remained friends. We both met up in the US of A again and started an adult friendship, we prayed together, belonged to a group she had started of young women dealing with everything-life, relationships, being a christian, etc. That was wonderful too.

Couple of years ago, my friend got married to the love of her life. In spite of the different talk that she was too young, some said maybe she wanted to have sex, but wanted to do the right thing-inside marriage. One time she had asked me to go with her to some guy's b/day get-together, this was her first appearance with the guy's family and she needed back up. The good friend i was, i kuku ma went. Six months or less, down the time, my friend calls me one random day and says she's getting married and would love for me to be a bridesmaid. Now, i can't really remember the engagement period, but i remember us planning for this wedding sha. I went with her dress shopping a couple of times, and bridesmaids outfit shopping too. The wedding was beautiful, couple of friends from primary school reunited, and some from that camp back in nigeria.

Another year and a half later, my friend had her first child, beautiful little girl, first child i saw with her eyes open two days after they had her.

Another two years down the line and my friend is getting a divorce. What went wrong? I don't know. She's a God-fearing young woman, She knows the word of God and bible principles and all that. She's spoken/counselled young girls over a period of time too; so i can't explain what went wrong. Now the problem is that my friend has up to this date not told me a thing. I heard from her husband. Because of some arrangement, i happen to see my friend almost everyday. Should i mention it to her that i know? I'm i supposed to say sorry about your marriage? or just act like nothing is happening.

This morning, in regards to something with their child, my friend's husband told me, can't you talk to her? Isn't she your friend? What am i supposed to say? I'm really not the kind to interfer in people's family affairs, never been married before so i don't even have advice to give.

Anyone has any thots?

See me see Wahala

Ok, so this girl eh, i don't even know what kinda games she's playing. I know she's suspicious of my friendship with her brother who has a girlfriend but pays me too much attention, but hey... if i'm good like that, i can't blame him. But on a serious note though, i don't want her brother like that, he really is just a good friend and i even advice him on his babe sef. I know this girl has issues with it still though, because someone else confirmed it to me.



So why is she now offering me a man? even after i said i'm in a relationship o? calls me up today about some 37 year old man looking for a wife. The man's birthday is this coming sunday and he wants her to bring him a wifey material girl and this _ _ _ _ _(thank God i'm saved) calls me up askng me if i wanted to go.



I don't even know what to say to her... i feel insulted sef. Ok i'm closer to 30 than i want to believe and so what? I'm not desperating looking to get married in the next 3-6 months; sorry but for me 37 is old. close to 40 does not sound attracting to me. Besides, God forgive me o, if judging by the girls crew, the guy i'm suspecting has to be kinda on the yoruba fuji side. I say that because a group of them gather together often saying they are from "isale eko" (downtown lagos) you know, for lack of a better word, i'll use the word razz, with their fuji kinda music.

Ok, i know what to tell her now. I guess this writing thing works.

A Plea

I'm using this medium to appeal to all armed robbers in nigeria. In the name of God, i'm begging you on my knees and from the innermost part of my heart and with everything that is within and is of me; LEAVE MY PAPA ALONE! He is all i have; abeg have mercy on a motherless child, i know you have one at home yourself- (Mi o shako) (it is not yanga) let atleast one of these people see their grandchildren (well atleast from me) or even let the ones he has now grow pass the age of 5; in this case, since death was cruel enough to take his wife, then you robbers should allow this one time.



Allow him to reap the fruits of his labor, the man tried, i lie to you not. The man actually told me one day like this that even if he has to drink garri everyday, we his children will not suffer; and suffer, we did not.

It's only remaining small eh, i will marry and have those kids the man wants to see, abeg let him atleast walk his daughter down the aisle, he has not gotten the opportunity to do that yet as per the ones wey don marry are boys. I still don't have that money yet to buy the man his car or whatever it is he wants, so abeg allow me time eh, biko, ejoo.

But sha o, you rogues no dey fear sha, i can bet the man is older than your parents at home, and you still had the guts to tell him to lie flat on the floor. It's sad to say that driving in nigeria, you anticipate things like this and have hidden corners in your car. You people didn't find the 3 mobile phones the man carries around like his into some shady business abi? sorry about that.

But ehh, abeg, if you happen to be reading this, return the cologne in the traveling bag, i beg of you, if you want cologne, just e-mail i will buy, but papa's own dey cost me too much money and i just got that one, me thinking i'm good to go atleast till January, then una just take am like that. There are still no money tries in this country, i work pretty damn hard and every penny counts. The rest of the trouser and shirts, and the senegalese kaftan, i give you permission to keep or give to your own folks.

As you can see, i have not insulted you in this message, i could have cursed you and your entire household. But as a child of God, all i have done is pleaded with you... so please ehh, harken. I will also leave you with advice from the good book:

Exodus 20:15: “THOU SHALT NOT STEAL

woe be unto the man, woman, boy or girl who breaks this commandment!

"Let those who have ears, hear". (and those who have eyes, read)

Spider/Superstition

I officially have to stop watching yourba movies.

Last week i watched one movie that this guy got charmed after supposedly walking through a spider's web.

Well, today at work same thing happened to me. I ignored it and got it off my face until a co-worker of mine said i had a spider on my hair. For some dumb reason i paniced, after she took it off i started to plead the blood of Jesus, at the same time rejecting and rebuking every plan contrary to the plan of God over my life.

Meanwhile this lady is looking at me, if she could speak pigin, she would probably have asked "abi i don kolo." She's indian and actually told me it was a good omen in her country. Something about my wishes would come to pass. I really just starred at her like a zombie.

I just realized i actually have a harder time opening up than i thought. I'm really a personal person and this blogging thing has only just made me realize how bad i have it. There are actually only two people in my real world that know i have a blog. One has no access to it, at least that's what i think, and the other, "my friend" i blogged about, i doubt can remember the web address. Yet i realize that i can't open up on the blog; i would rather blog bout someone else's story or gist than mine. Hmmm, Interesting.

Anyway, while doing some blog rounds, i realized one thing a lot of we female bloggers have in common is our male isssues, and the funniest of late is that of those looking for "life partners." I read a post from vera's blog and i completely share the sentiments. Thanks Vera for keeping it too real. (Those when are you getting married, or when is your turn questions are alot nerving.)



What's funny is that i've seen and heard my engagement being planned infront of me without me being engaged. My uncle, aunt, and i had just gotten back from one of many weddings, i guess this one must have been a really nice one, can't even remember myself but i do remember while we sat analyzing everyone and everything that went down, the conversation drifted to how they would do it different for my wedding. It was so funny it was ridiculous; the conversation went from how the back of the house would be decorated, the canopies to be rented, to the colors of the day, the "elere" as we yorubas call the entertainers to perform, and all the good stuff involved with weddings. All of this planning going on without me being engaged o. What i'm i talking about, infact without me having a boyfriend. Sad huh?



I understand they are anxious like every other parent but abeg, can they cut me some slack. Every guy friend that comes looking for me has become a potential in my house and my uncle is quick to ask what kinda friend after the initial introduction. Atleast, i like his style, his quick to ask in front of the two of us-it's ok, i always prepare them guys ready if they are coming to the house for the first time. My aunt on the other hand waits until we're alone to ask what the deal is with the guy. Of-course i'm quick to say we're just friends, then she begins her short lecture on being a good wife, and the fact that we women just have to deal with men the way they are, they don't have to be perfect, just try to work with what you have...blah, blah, blah.



And then there are the other uncles and aunties out there, including those ones that are not even real aunties and uncles, the by default ones. Those ones that often expect you to bring some dude to an event or the other and when that does not happen they ask "Oko e da?" like Oko translates to husband, abeg who put ring on my finger? Then they also want to introduce you to some random dude they believe will make a good husband or that they are convinced is a good match for you; meanwhile i'm thinking to myself why the dude can't find his own babe. One of several reasons, his a tat bit too old, (forgive me for this), but maybe his razz, or he just cannot talk to a female by himself. Oh yeah, there is also that uncle that asks any and everybody if they have a good and intelligent younger brother, cousin, or friend that is looking for a wife. Maybe they've not heard me say it loud enough, I CAN FIND MY OWN MAN, AND I WILL!! Just waiting for God to do His thing!

On the other hand, it's funny how there are still the ones that believe that i'm so secretive and hiding the guy. Common now, i'm getting old, at my age why would i be doing under J with any guy? Although, the rate everyone around me is desperately waiting for it, i may just keep the guy on the downlow for real. Like some guy also told me, "i don't look like the kind that does not have a boyfriend. I'm actually considering writing "No man" on my head to church on for sundays. Not like there are any eligible bachs' at my church sha, but just a thought, would like to see the reults.

I've also heard that i'm too fast in judging guys and condemning them. This i know is not true really. Ok, so i like smart people, is that my fault? I can't stand a guy that can't keep up a conversation, or a guy that his conversation is centered around the same boring stuff, so i'm into nigerian politics? What is wrong with that? If you don't follow it, it's ok but don't give me a dumb look like i'm out of my mind. I say you're "cynical" and you're asking me what does that mean? or our conversation can only be sweet when it's in yoruba, now that's the worse one of all. I've actually had a guy tell me he prefers to speak yoruba than english, silly, that's because you can't speak good english.

Ok, i started this post with something else in mind and i think it's taken another direction and it's just a rant now. I can't be bothered to go back and edit either, it's become a long post too and that's because i'm in the library and too tired to actually study so i thought i'ld write...

Nursery Rhymes

Yesterday, my cousin reminded me of the nursery rhymes from back in the days. Unfortunately, kids in yankee are not taught a lot of these rhymes these days. Anyway, she pointed out something and it actually gave us a real crack up. The fact that those songs/rhymes had an element of violence in them. Examples:



Jack and Jill went up the hill...: Abeg, why does Jack have to break his neck?

Goosey Goosey Gander: Why did they have to throw the old man that could not say his prayer down the stairs: "i took him by the left leg, and threw him down the stairs."

Rock-a-bye-baby: Please why is anyone rocking a baby by the tree top, surely that can't be soothing.

Three blind mice: Why do they have to chase the farmer's wife and then she had to get all poster on them and cut off their tails with a knife.

Ever famous Humpty Dumpty: The poor thing broke into too many pieces. (My sister has quite a nice drawing she did of this, i should put it up, if i can get a hold of it)

I also remember a song from secondary school in nigeria, don't remember all the words, but it had something to do with going to jail: "take a message to Mary, but don't tell where i am, take a message to Mary, but don't tell her i'm in jail; you can tell her i've gone to see the world, tell her i'll be back someday, but tell she better not wait for me, but don't tell her i'm in jail..." Any reason why this person was in jail?

Anyway, just thought all of these were funny, no wonder America is not teaching their kids these songs, many would agree that they don't need it at the rate they are going; 6 year old getting chased by police after stealing school bus, 5 year old killing younger sister, 6 year old stealing grandma's car to go to get something to eat. Now, this story is funny, 6 year old boy really wanted food from some eatery, took his granma's car, transfered his car seat to the front, belted himself and just drove off until he ran into an electric pole.

What a wonderful world we live in!!!

Really can't think of a good title

So, i'm at work and this new indian lady is reading palms, of-course them nosy people hear want to hear what they have to say about everyone and i'm coerced into it. Now i must say i absolutely do not believe in palm reading but it was interesting hearing her. Right in front of them all i was quick to reject all the nonsense in the mighty name of Jesus. But in all, i guess i'm going to have some good money somewhere along the line, i have a strong aura about me and my faith line is really good, i'm still going to read some more, even though i've convinced myself that no PHD in my future, i mean, me is completely tired of this reading business-masters i believe is the height of it for me, and like my aunt keeps begging my uncle to stop encouraging me to do Phd so that i can get married and have kids.

Now, the funny one is that she currently sees no love/marriage line. I don't think some of these people understand heaven principles sha. It's o.k, i doubt they've heard bout some serious "fire" prayers that make things happen or our mountain top prayers. With those kinda support, i'm bound to have my own husband. Oh, yeah, so she sees only one child and another half line which means the child was supposed but never came into existence.(abortion or stillborn) Me i don't know....and my life line is actually long too. (Funny).

Once again, i rebuke the devourer over my life in Jesus name.